and i repeat myself the good words. and i try to remember every inch of him, but the memory is fading. still i linger on what i have: vague vults of his hair, his eyes, his chest, his goofy and at the same time charming laughter.
i’m not sure why i do this. i guess i just want that feeling to stay, i want to feel that way again. i want to feel… completely capable of making someone happy. completely capable of being truly happy with someone. like i’ve never felt before.
i’m not sure if what i felt was real, or if i’ll ever be able to feel that way again. maybe that’s the reason i want it to last. i want to feel that good forever. and i’m not sure i can.
-
fuck it, i need to get some sleep
